Trouble In Paradise
Hey Stokies, Gossip Bitch here
Take a moment to enjoy the last few days of sunshine. It’s true, all good things come to an end and summer is no exception. It’s trouble in paradise. All you sun-hungry individuals looking to escape some cold and drama for a few warm evenings, Morocco may be your answer. Unfortunately for some though, it will be your undoing. They don’t call it Fall for nothing.
As soon as Oktoberfest ended, some ran away to Barcelona to catch a few last rays of sun, while others snuck away to Morocco just in time for Eid al-Adha, the “Feast of the Sacrifice” and what a sacrifice it was indeed.
Things got a little hot at the bonfire one fiery evening and this poor boy was unknowingly becoming the victim of this so called feast. As he continued to drink himself to slumber, slayer #1 Bobbed right up to him. As she was doing so, slayer #2 decided this piece of meat is a bit more satisfying than the Kiwi’s she’s normally used to. Don’t fret girls, there’s plenty of fish in the sea, not just trout.
Conclusively, slayer #2 had the final kill, except the poor boy apparently has no recollection of it. Perhaps goldfish aren’t the only animals with a bad memory? Or maybe the night just wasn’t so memorable.
As the night progressed and people became more intoxicated, more and more retired to their beds. But who can really sleep with all those animals roaring during these cool African nights? Hold on a moment…those aren’t the noises of wild animals we hear, but rather, the noise of a human variety. The mating call of Thumbelina, Princess of toasties, together with wannabe Nate Archibald is keeping everyone awake. Luckily King Toasty, the Princess’s father, is nowhere in sight, otherwise we would have had to make another feast, serving Nate as the entree.
Remember slayer #1? Well let’s not feel too bad for her. As far as one knows, she has her hands full. However, I’m not saying that’s exactly a good thing. Obviously there would be risks involved in hooking up with the town creeper. Rapunzel, Rapunzel, no need to let down your golden hair, because your last night’s lover is climbing up the wall anyway to crash the party! He doesn’t like that you’ve moved on so he’s bothering other women, but it’s all a facade. His prime target is still you. Okay Prince Charming, I think you’ve had your fun and now it’s time to get booted. Rapey.
It’s the morning after the ball and everyone is seeing double. Stunt-double, that is. Kim, the almost celeb, has both male and female googly eyes over him.
Surf instructor Montgomery is not impressed. He refuses to leave his summer of love stretch behind in San Sebastian, so he’s taking it with him to Morocco. Visit Magic Monty, Manager at the Heartbreak Hotel, in Taghazout to help him carry on his legacy.
Unlike the rest of us, scandals never take a vacation. Instead, they take a flight to Austria. Some say winter is their busiest season.
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